~Be Still~

Today, I feel as if we could all use some encouragement, some little glimpse of hope. I have been in need of this for a little while. I have decided to turn to the one Person I know provides hope, and more than encouragement, He fills the soul. So, instead of just me writing a bunch of stuff about me and my journey, I thought we'd join His today. Let's listen to Him as He speaks truth over us. Are you with me?

I chose you and have not rejected you.
Isaiah 41:9

I have called you by your name; you are mine.
Isaiah 43:1

Since you were precious in my eyes, you are honored, and I love you.

Isaiah 43:4

Praise the LORD, O my soul; all my inmost being praise His holy Name. Praise the LORD, O my soul, and forget not all His benefits-

Who forgives all your sins

and heals all your diseases,

Who redeems your life from the pit

and who crowns you with love and compassion,

who satisfies your desires with good things so that your youth is renewed like the eagle's.

Psalm 103:1-5

She is clothed with strength and dignity.

Proverbs 31:25Remember Susan, from Narnia? If anyone from those stories/movies is a picture of being clothed with strength and dignity, it's her. She was afraid of everything, until Aslan empowered her and showed her her value and when she believed what she was capable of, she who once was timid became a mighty warrior.

Last night, I was watching "The Chronicles of Narnia: the Voyage of the Dawn Treader", the 3rd movie, and it's like parts of it were written for me, but especially this part:

"You doubt your value; don't run from who you are."I have chosen you and have not rejected you.

Isaiah 41:9 (Yes, I know I already wrote this one out, but it bears repeating after that great scene with Aslan, don't you think?)

You will increase my honor and comfort me once again.

Psalm 71:21

A friend posted a quote from John Piper on Facebook today and it ministered to me so much, I wrote it down and want to share it with you now:

"God is plotting for your joy."

I LOVE that!! My last thing I want to leave you with, and it's something I've been pondering ever since last night, is:

Think like Edmund.If anyone knew what it was like to give into the temptations of evil, it was Edmund. But once he got it, he never backed down and he was the quickest to dispel evil because he recognized it. I have been working through some lies I have believed all my life and Edmund to me is a picture of how we fight lies. Once we taste truth and the freedom therein, we cannot back down. We must stand up and not let the enemy of our God, who prowls around like a lion, we must not let him win any strongholds in us. We must recognize him and live like the royalty we are and proclaim victory for ourselves. It's ours. So let's take it.

I don't know what your struggle is today, but I know what mine is. And I know that the only way to win the fight for our lives is to follow Jesus. Do what He does. Fight the way He fights. Live the way He lives. And rebuke His enemy the way He rebukes His enemy. Wield the Sword (His Word) the way He does.

I have put my words in your mouth and and covered you with the shadow of my hand.

Isaiah51:16

"No weapon forged against you will prevail and you will refute every tongue that accuses you. This is the heritage of the servants of the LORD, and this is their vindication from me." declares the LORD.

Isaiah54:17

Did you catch that? That's our heritage!!! No matter what our history is, no matter the mistakes we've made, we have a new heritage. Narnia is just a picture. You and I have our own Kingdom and our God lives there. Until He takes us to be with Him forever, He lives in us. Even Aslan wasn't that close!

Are you tired? Worn out ? Burned out on religion? Come to me. Get away with me and you'll recover your life. I'll show you how to take a real rest. Walk with me and work with me- Watch how I do it. Learn the unforced rhythms of grace. I won't lay anything heavy or ill-fitting on you. Keep company with me and you'll learn to live freely and lightly.

Matthew 11:28-30

Be Still. Don't worry, you'll get everything done in life you need to. But, in your soul, in your mind, in your heart, be still. Everything falls into place.....don't trust me, I'm still working on believing that!! But trust Him. He says so, and what He says, we can trust.

Jesus replied, "Love the LORD your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.

Matthew 22:37

"Both Sides Now"- Cilla's Sun Version

The sunset last night was fabulous. As I watched it, I realized something; it keeps moving. I know that's not a novel thought. Rather how it's supposed to be, right? But something cool happened as I was pondering the sun moving. If it didn't move, it'd be the worst natural disaster ever. Chaos would ensue. Everything in the world be off the Richter scale because the sun is our source for heat, it's pretty much everything to us. I watched it move and become more and more beautiful and with my camera on my phone, I stopped the action.
But it never stopped. It just kept going down. And as it went down, it got more beautiful, more radiant. And that's when it hit me.....I want it to stop so I can just take in it's beauty and just let it beautiful there for just a moment......

If you know me at all, you know I hate the thick clouds that cover the sky and make my head miserable. But as I watched the sunset last night, I realized that no matter what the sky looks like to me, the sun is still moving. Sometimes I want it to race ahead of the clouds so that I can see it again, and sometimes I want it to be still so I can just watch what it does in it's magnificence. But no, it just slowly keeps marching on.....

And I realized, I sometimes do what I wanted the sun to do last night: I sometimes pause and want beautiful moments to last forever, or at least longer than than they do. Or sometimes when moments are really awful, I want to speed right through them. But it doesn't work like that. Just like the sun, life marches on, sometimes it seems slowly, sometimes it seems too fast, but in reality, it's a slow steady pace. I came across this quote a few days ago....

Right on, Jessica, and your friend Paul!! If we avoided parts of life, sped thru them, or if we paused too long on the parts of life we want to linger on, chaos would ensue, just like if the sun sped up or stopped.

I think I want to be more like the sun. Have you noticed from my pictures that as it goes down, it becomes more brilliant?

And that is what make me see that I don't really want to speed thru hard times or even stop on the beautiful parts. Because what I think is beautiful doesn't come close to what is next. I can't even dream up the beauty awaiting the next bend. All I can do is move steady with the sun.

And trust my Creator, just like the sun.

"I consider that our present sufferings are not worth comparing with the glory that will be revealed in us. The creation waits in eager expectiation for the sons of God to be revealed. "
Romans 8:18-19

"....For you who revere my name, the sun of righteousness will rise with healing its wings. And you will go out and leap like calves released from the stall."
Malachi 4:2




I really don't know life.....at all. But I know the Author of Life and I know I can trust Him to lead me, just like He leads the sun.

The 7th is Unlucky....

Praise be to the Lord, to God our Savior, who daily bears our burdens.
Psalm 68:19

Haha, I know this is a weird song for me to start with, but bear with me, ok?

Today is the 7th, and it's a hard day for me for @ least two reasons.

Reason #1: My grandpa died in my house 7 months ago today. I've been drawn to his kinda music lately, partly because I just saw "Coal Miner's Daughter" with Sissy Spacek, and I've wanted to hear some real Loretta Lynn. So today, as I was scanning his photos for the family, I indulged in a little Loretta,

a little Patsy, (if you lived in my house for the past year, you knew how OFTEN we heard this song!!)

a little of the Judds,

and I realized that I kinda like his kinda music. Grandpa would be proud.

Reason #2: I had a boyfriend 2 months ago today; now I don't; enough said.(Don't worry,I won't post a song for this reason that I'm blue.....even though one by the Judds does come to mind.)

Death, life. It's all hard sometimes. Haha, and the sun is even shining and it's still a blue day for me.

Hope. I had some yesterday, and because I had it yesterday, I have no doubt but that it will return. God always comes thru.

Summon Your power, O God; show us Your Strength, O God, as you have done before.
Psalm 68:28

I have thought so much that I want a new life. But this life is mine. And it is mostly good: I have my family, a job that looks promising, my friends,and most importantly, I have my God. I also have my pride, and my dignity. Life may have not turned out the way I wanted it.....yet. It's still not over. Yes, my grandpa is gone, and the era of being a caregiver's daughter (Loretta is still in my head, can you tell?) is over. Yes, I no longer have a boyfriend, and the dreams I had are put on hold in a whole new way, but my dreams still exist, just not with him. Today is rough, but tomorrow will be easier, and next month will be another month past all my grief. Sorrow is a part of life. It expands the heart to make room for joy. I will be one heck of a joyful person someday.

The LORD is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.

Psalm 34:18

I know this to be true. I don't know what's going on in your life if you're reading this right now. Maybe you're in a season of grief, too. I only listed 2 reasons it's my season right now, believe me I could list more. I'm sure you could, too. The Lord knows what you're going thru and I want you to know, because He wants you and me both to know: He loves you, Dear Heart. He is on your side. He wants you to turn to Him in your grief and pain. He wants to walk with you and talk with you, cry with you even. Let's let Him in, Love. He might not take the pain away quite yet, but He makes it bearable. This time in our lives might be rough, but someday when we look back, they will be the sweetest we've ever had if we let Him in and be the Savior He gave up Heaven to be.

Those who seek the LORD lack no good thing.

Psalm 34: 10

LORD, I have heard of your fame; I stand in awe of your deeds, O LORD. Renew them in my day, in my time make them known.

Habakkuk 2:2 (emphasis and personalization are mine)

The Land of the Living

This was my most recent status update on Facebook this afternoon:

"Priscilla loves what God is doing in my life, and believe me, He is getting the last laugh.....He is AWESOME!!!!!

"Do not let your hearts be troubled. Trust in God; trust also in me."

John 14:1

"I am still confident of this: I will see the goodness of the LORD in the land of the living. Wait for the LORD; be strong and take heart and wait for the LORD."

Psalm 27:13-14"

Yes, I know, a long post, haha!! That's how this girl rolls, lol. Did I actually just say L O L on here?!? I am slipping!! Maybe I'm caffeinated....maybe it's that the sun is out....and maybe I am finally able to accept the goodness of the land of the LORD in the land of the living.

Right before my grandpa died, literally the night before, I wrote this blog post. The next day, he died and then that night I opened my Bible and I read the most awesome verse that I knew was a promise then:

"I am still confident of this: I will see the goodness of the LORD in the land of the living."

Psalm 27:13

I had seen the goodness of the LORD in the valley of the shadow of death. I have walked this valley for years and when it finally came to an end, it wasn't relief I felt, as some hoped I'd feel. It was sweet, it was bitter, it was release, it was grief, it was sad, it was pain, it was God.

Last night, I was reminded of what I gave up to say yes to God in helping with the daily events of my grandparents. And for the first time, my feelings weren't bitter. They were sweet as I realized that I haven't missed out on a thing. What God asked of me- my life- He is giving back tenfold. My friends were teasing me about not knowing much music besides Country and Christian.....hey, there is nothing wrong with those, I'm just sayin'. But I was trying to figure out why I didn't know any of the stuff they were talking about, and it's a small thing, but it's something, I never got a chance to hear it because I was helping my grandpa to the car, I was keeping my grandma from falling over when she walked with her walker, I was running errands with my mom, I was feeling like I was missing out, and feeling left out of life. I feel bad now because I desperately wanted my life to change, I had my moments of being a total brat as I threw my tantrums and wanted out of my life. But the thing that kept me going was that THIS IS WHAT I CHOSE BECAUSE IT'S WHAT GOD WANTED FROM ME.

Today, I am rejoicing about my life because I did the hard stuff- I'm not dumb enough to think the hard stuff is over....life is life and sometimes life is hell. But thank God, because of Him, life can be sweet.

So, I didn't grow up listening to the "cool" music and what-not.....guess what, I am being educated now and I love it!! I am looking back at my life and I can truly say that I am glad I have lived the life I've lived. Plain, boring, and yet filled with God-stops along the way that made me love my life before I have what I have now. And now I am seeing the goodness of the LORD in the land of the living.....and it is awesome!!! Beth Moore said once that God should fill us up to the top, whatever blessing He gives should just be the cup running over.....

My cup runneth over

I absolutely HATE the thick clouds that cover the entire sky with their gray-ness. Really, I do. It actually affects my psyche and sometimes gives me a headache and makes me want to throw up. So, yeah, I really HATE the clouds!!!! That could be why I'm listening to this song right now.

"With ALL CREATION I sing praise to the King of kings, You are my Everything, and I will adore You!!"

All of creation is from God. From earthquakes to tsunamis, to tornadoes and hurricanes, to these awful clouds. I want to learn to live above this fog that comes over me when there are days (weeks) like these.

"We walk by faith, not by sight."

2 Corinthians 5:7

My cousin is a pilot and I remember him saying once that Maine is the worst place to fly into because of the fog. He can only rely on his instruments to help him land because he cannot see outside. Talk about faith. We can only hope his instruments never let him down!!

I'm not kidding when I say what the clouds are doing to my head. I am a positive, upbeat person who loves life, but when there are thick clouds that make a day all gloomy because there is no chance of them going away, I turn into a negative person who doesn't have an upbeat thought in her head!! I want to love the clouds as much as I love the blue sky and sunshine because God created both. If nothing else, because He created them.

When I was little, my mom would help me and my brother change our attitudes about life, and eachother, by telling us to say 10 good things about eachother, I mean, life. Haha!! So, I'm going to share with you my 10 good things about my life after this song.....I tried to find the least cheesy version and I love blue grass, so here goes, lol:

1) One week ago today, I officially started dating a man who makes my heart all twitterpated and who makes me think fairytales are real.

2) I have a blossoming career in photography, I never asked for it, but here it is.

3) I have the best mother in the world, she is my best friend.

4) My dad is pretty cool, too. :0)

5) I have friends who love me.....if you're reading this, you know who you are.

6) I have my God who inspired me to love the clouds because He created them.

7) His word is healing to me.

8) Did I mention that I have a boyfriend? ;0)

9) I love oldies, and cranking them up really loud and singing them (wrong) with my mama is pretty much my favorite thing to do right now.

10) I am loved by a Holy God. What could be better than that?

Yep, I'm still not liking the clouds so much, but I am feeling better. How about you? How are you today? I hope that whatever fog you face today, whether it be the weather or emotional or physical, I pray He touches you. You are loved, my friend!!

One more song and then I'm outta here to go get ready to meet some girlfriends for lunch. I love you and I hope your day is just a little brighter today!!!

Don't Stop Believing

"She is clothed with strength and dignity; she can laugh at the days to come."
Proverbs 31:25

Does anyone need those words today? Especially, if you're a woman reading this? I know I do. I am in great need of strength with a little dignity poured in there, and I definitely need the ability to laugh at the days to come. I am in need of peace of mind. Life throws its blows, but I need to know from the inside out that I am loved and that I am forgiven. I love how it's phrased in this verse: CLOTHED. As women, we love our clothes, and our accessories. How about as we apply that mascara and (my favorite) our lipstick, we also put on strength and dignity?

I'm the curious type; I want to know exactly what something means when I study the Bible. I love finding out and I think you will, too, what exactly strength and dignity mean in the Hebrew:

STRENGTH- Force, security, majesty, praise;- boldness, loud, might, power, strength, strong.

DIGNITY- Magnificence, ie. ornament, or splendor (Did I not mention accessories? Haha, I believe that right there is an accessory we can don); beauty, comeliness, excellency, glorious, glory, goodly, honor, majesty.

In other words, my dear hearts, we are clothed with God Himself. Did you notice that? All those qualities are what describe God. We can be clothed with Him, and consciously, every day, choosing to trust Him and love Him and obey Him, makes this happen. Constant conversation with Him and asking questions of Him without questioning Him, causes such intimacy, you can hardly not speak about, but you can almost not because He becomes everything to you. Anything you love, you talk about. Most women talk about shoes, clothes, jewelry, men, children, shoes, make up, hair, shoes.....Haha!!! We almost can't not!! And women who are in love? My gosh!!! I have seen love turn a perfectly sensible woman into a pile of mush!! Imagine what we'd be like if we clothed ourselves with Jesus. Everything else would fall into place, and our conversations would still be about shoes, clothes, jewelry, men, children, shoes, makeup, and hair, but they would be laced with grace and love. Even if we never said it, we would be wearing His name.

I have been enjoying the new movies coming out that are really action packed and have such comedy I literally ROFL!! (Ok, more like the couch than the floor, but you get the picture.) One thing that stands out to me more and more are the funny guys who keep their wits about them in really distressing times. Like this video....(Sorry, youtube didn't have an embed code for this one, but please click on the link and watch it!!)


"Where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is freedom."
2 Corinthians 3:17

"Those who trust in the LORD are like Mount Zion, which cannot be shaken but endures forever."
Psalm 125:1

If you know you're covered, it doesn't matter what happens, you can play around because you're connected to your Protector and Defender. Beloved, we are covered!! He has our back, just like Cougar had Jensen's back in the video above. And the freedom we have is astounding. Believe it.

On a personal level, I really need this. I'm not ok. I have my good days, but in general, I am not ok. I have been thru such a hard year, and before that, many hard years with mind excruciatingly hard days. Losing my grandpa was more than just how it sounds, in his death, most of my identity died, too. I'm no longer the girl who "helps take care of my grandpa". I feel sometimes like I have a big gaping hole in me that's just flapping open to the wind and I feel every draft. Not very many people understand this pain, this loss. It's like I'm 18 again without a clue as to what's next, only 10 times worse. For a whole year, I was tensed up waiting for my grandpa to fall, hoping he'd eat, and of course, waiting for the inevitable, his death. Now, my body is recovering from all that stress. I have been sickly off and on for months. Sometimes all I have the energy for is to read my Bible and talk with my mom, who feels what I feel only multiplied by 100. And in recovering, my family just keeps getting hit by one thing after another. As one of my relatives said about her mom, "My mom just has the worst luck!!" I can fully relate. If I'm not going to stop being hit, then something in me needs to change. I need some new clothes!! Haha, anyone want to go shopping with me? I want to be clothed with strength and with dignity so that when things come up, I can stand up against the enemy of God and be absolutely victorious because MY GOD HAS MY BACK!!!



This is my new "theme song", a song that as I listen makes me hear where I find the answers in life and where I find that strength and that dignity: Jesus Christ.

“You are strong and the word of God lives in you, and you have overcome the evil one.”
1 John 2:14

Mission Possible

"Apart from Me you can do nothing."
John 15:5

"The Kingdom of God is like...."



Life is a parable; all we have to do is watch and listen and we'll see we are living the parable He is teaching us. It's brutal out there. You don't even have to be out looking for trouble for trouble to find you. The other day I was reading thru my 3X5 spiral Scripture note cards and when I literally laughed outloud as the memory of the above video clip flitted thru my mind when I read "APART FROM ME YOU CAN DO NOTHING." With me, without me; with me, without me; WITH me WITHOUT me.

There's another scene from the movie that captures my heart when I think about it. I'll just tell you because the clip is in the preview and if you haven't seen it, it might spoil it for you. In the movie, they get captured and she wakes up to him swinging like a pendulum saying, "June, I know this looks bad, but I'm gonna have us outta here in a few minutes. I got this." It kinda just reminds me of this:



This looks bad. It was. Honestly, I haven't been able to watch the movie and I can barely stand looking at this picture because I know the real story was worse than could ever be portrayed by an actor. As He hung on a cross, in essence the message is: "I know this looks bad, it is. But I have this. Just give me three days and I'll be free and so will you."

For some reason, this blogpost is harder to write than others. Probably because I need it so much. The website hasn't been working for me all that great and so I have had to post it little by little. So, with every "this tab has been recovered" session, I've become more and more determined to post this as I've lost it about 50 times already. It's not just the website, though. It's life. Right now, right this minute actually, my family faces one more challenge in life. The challenge is to trust when we've been wronged in doing the right thing. We have had another recent death in the family and issues have just been mounting until we wonder where God is in the distraction of life. How do we take the quiet times with Him into the busyness of life?

"With me, without me; with me, without me; WITH me, WITHOUT me."

Without Him, life is terrifying. With Him, it becomes an adventure worth living. What I desperately want is peace of mind in the chaos. I want to know my God fights for me and is in it with me and that He will save me when I need Him to. I know life happens, chaos erupts- both in the world as a whole as well as my own Priscilla world. But God is all about bringing peace to chaos: Creation was Him bringing peace to chaos; in the midst of Israel's chaos, a Savior was born. And in chaos, His death brought peace. I need that. My guess is, you do, too.

So, are we with Him?

As Tom Cruise says later in the movie, "With you."

Amen, Sir.