The Land of the Living

This was my most recent status update on Facebook this afternoon:

"Priscilla loves what God is doing in my life, and believe me, He is getting the last laugh.....He is AWESOME!!!!!

"Do not let your hearts be troubled. Trust in God; trust also in me."

John 14:1

"I am still confident of this: I will see the goodness of the LORD in the land of the living. Wait for the LORD; be strong and take heart and wait for the LORD."

Psalm 27:13-14"

Yes, I know, a long post, haha!! That's how this girl rolls, lol. Did I actually just say L O L on here?!? I am slipping!! Maybe I'm caffeinated....maybe it's that the sun is out....and maybe I am finally able to accept the goodness of the land of the LORD in the land of the living.

Right before my grandpa died, literally the night before, I wrote this blog post. The next day, he died and then that night I opened my Bible and I read the most awesome verse that I knew was a promise then:

"I am still confident of this: I will see the goodness of the LORD in the land of the living."

Psalm 27:13

I had seen the goodness of the LORD in the valley of the shadow of death. I have walked this valley for years and when it finally came to an end, it wasn't relief I felt, as some hoped I'd feel. It was sweet, it was bitter, it was release, it was grief, it was sad, it was pain, it was God.

Last night, I was reminded of what I gave up to say yes to God in helping with the daily events of my grandparents. And for the first time, my feelings weren't bitter. They were sweet as I realized that I haven't missed out on a thing. What God asked of me- my life- He is giving back tenfold. My friends were teasing me about not knowing much music besides Country and Christian.....hey, there is nothing wrong with those, I'm just sayin'. But I was trying to figure out why I didn't know any of the stuff they were talking about, and it's a small thing, but it's something, I never got a chance to hear it because I was helping my grandpa to the car, I was keeping my grandma from falling over when she walked with her walker, I was running errands with my mom, I was feeling like I was missing out, and feeling left out of life. I feel bad now because I desperately wanted my life to change, I had my moments of being a total brat as I threw my tantrums and wanted out of my life. But the thing that kept me going was that THIS IS WHAT I CHOSE BECAUSE IT'S WHAT GOD WANTED FROM ME.

Today, I am rejoicing about my life because I did the hard stuff- I'm not dumb enough to think the hard stuff is over....life is life and sometimes life is hell. But thank God, because of Him, life can be sweet.

So, I didn't grow up listening to the "cool" music and what-not.....guess what, I am being educated now and I love it!! I am looking back at my life and I can truly say that I am glad I have lived the life I've lived. Plain, boring, and yet filled with God-stops along the way that made me love my life before I have what I have now. And now I am seeing the goodness of the LORD in the land of the living.....and it is awesome!!! Beth Moore said once that God should fill us up to the top, whatever blessing He gives should just be the cup running over.....

My cup runneth over