The Eye of the Storm

Have you ever been trapped by a storm? More specifically, have you ever been trapped from your house because of a storm? Yesterday afternoon, my mom and I were stopped by, we think @ least, 2 tornadoes. I've never quite felt like I did yesterday. Kinda panicked because all I wanted was to go home and hide in my basement with my family and my most precious items, journals, Bible, jewelry, my new dresses. I'm sure I could have found more things to add to my list of "most precious items", like my laptop. After being trapped in town for a half hour, we tried to go home and then we had to turn around and stop at the closest shelter, but we still felt like we were very vulnerable. There were alot of people doing the same thing, just pulling over until the storm was manageable to drive through. I have been in my own personal storm these past few weeks (or should I say, I’ve been the CAUSE of my own personal storm?) I’ve been going through the rooms of my heart hoarding and hiding my treasures, much like I do when I’m at home and there’s a tornado. In Genesis, when Jacob left his father-in-law, his wife went and stole her father’s gods and then later sat on them so he wouldn’t find them. I don’t know the significance of the whole story, but I do know that she had his idols in her tent underneath her. The storm brewing in my heart and mind was causing such a ruckus in me that in a sense, I was hiding my idols underneath me so they wouldn’t be seen and so I could keep them. Our pastor preached a sermon last Sunday about heaven and he mentioned what won’t be in heaven, one thing being marriage.

ZING!!!

Yep, that was one of my idols. Wanna know how I knew for sure? God always makes sure we get the point and then REALLY get the point, doesn’t He? One of the last points of the sermon paraphrased was this, “What’s so important to you that you’re missing Jesus and heaven for?”

Gulp!!!

Heaven sounds incredibly awesome and it sounds really wonderful, except for one teensy, tiny little thing: no marriage (I know for some, this is like a “Yahooo”- type of thing). I’ve known this for awhile, but I’ve never really dealt with how I felt about that missing from heaven. Can we say, “Idol exposed!!!”?

While waiting out the storm next to the old grange-type building, something in me gave. When there's a storm and I’m home, all I think about are my “treasures” and what I want to keep- don’t judge me and say I’m materialistic, I like my stuff!! Being out there, literally being at the mercy of God, hoping the tree leaves and branches were the only thing that were flying out there, I realized there wasn’t a thing I could do about the storm. I can’t save my stuff at home or hold my dog. All I could do was be in awe of the beauty of it all…OUT THERE.

I was reminded of a storm my family drove through in Texas and Oklahoma a few years ago with our Chihuahua, KD. She was freaking out at the lightening that was hitting right around us and the loud thunder and she couldn’t calm down. Finally, when my dad stopped to check things out, my mom took KD out of the car and put her on the ground outside. It immobilized her and made her calm down. She put her in the back with me and KD just got as close to me as possible and started kissing my face. Her fear was still really real, but she knew who she could trust. It was a lesson to us all about how God is with us, He makes us face the storms in our life; He even leads us to them so that we’ll have to learn our dependence can only be on Him.

How ironic that the end of my heart’s storm came in the middle of a tornado.

How odd that God would calm me down while I was in a rocking car. It’s supernatural.

How ironic because I had just told my mom the day before, “It seems unnatural to give up my dreams!” Her paraphrased reply was, “Then you’re at a crossroads.”

How ironic that my heart took one step and then another while I was immobilized waiting out a storm.

How ironic indeed….

"God made my life complete when I placed all the pieces before Him...Every day I review the ways He works, I try not to miss a trick. I feel put back together, and I'm watching my step. God rewrote the text of my life when I opened the book of my heart to His eyes." 2 Samuel 22:21, 23-25 The Message